Our Story
wait for it...
yes! more ice cream! He said that he'd have to call me later to let me know the details, so he needed to get my number. Pretty smooth, eh? Except I knew exactly what he was doing.
The next day there was a dance and we were dancing together at one point and they played two slow songs in a row and I just might have kept talking through the end of the first one so he couldn't leave and find another dance partner for the next one without being rude...
It turns out it was worth it, because during that third slow dance he asked me out on a date! It was the sweetest thing too, because he was being shy, which isn't like him at all. He couldn't even look me in the eyes for very long without getting bashful and turning away!
And, the rest is history! We were married later that year on a cold and snowy day, and even though driving to our ceremony was really scary and Jayson was 45 minutes late, once we were married and stepped out of the temple to a blanket of freshly fallen snow, all was right in the world.
About 10 months after we got married we decided it was time to add a little one to our family. To our astonishment and great joy we got pregnant right away! We were so happy and immediately started planning for our new little one. However, we lost this baby at about 9 weeks along. Although we knew the likelyhood of miscarriages was high for me because I have what is called a reciprocal genetic translocation (which basically means I have all of the right genetic material, but some of it isn't in the right place because arms of certain chromosomes are switchted) we were still shocked and devistated. But, we had high hopes that we could get pregnant again since things happened so fast the first time. However, Things didn't go as planned. After a year and a half of trying to get pregnant again we learned that I have PCOS, which makes it difficult for me to get pregnant. We then tried many infertility treatments after that, all of which were unsuccessful. We came to realize that pregnancy wasn't our goal. Our goal was to be parents and it was what we wanted more than anything in the world. So, we started talking about adoption. After a lot of thinking, talking, learning, and praying about adoption... it just felt right. It just clicked and everything seemed to make sense and fall into place It felt like everything we had been through in our lives had led to it. After we had been approved for adoption we also started looking into being foster parents and that felt right too. Again, we had the overwhelming feeling of so many things leading to this one thing. It was one of those "the answer hits you like a ton of bricks" moments. So, we got licensed for that as well.
About 9 months after we were approved for adoption we got a phone call from a friend of an expectant mother that we had been getting to know saying that she had chosen us to adopt her baby boy that was due in four months. It was one of the happiest moments of our lives. We were nervous and uneasy many times anticipating this baby boy, but excited none-the-less. However, a few weeks before she was due she disappeared. We ended up finding out through facebook that she had the baby and had decided to parent. It was such a hard thing to go through at the time, but in retrospect we realize that it turned out as it should have.
Four years after we had started our journey to being parents (and about two months after our failed adoption) Jayden was placed with us through foster care at the age of 2 1/2. We bonded with him very quickly and everyone we knew fell in love with him almost just as fast. We knew that the goal of foster care is to re-unite children with their families if at all possible. It was hard to think about him every leaving us, but we also grew to love his biological mom and wanted her to succeed. When that path didn't work out it was heartbreaking for all of us. Not too long after he turned 5 we were finally able to legally adopt him and it was such a happy day. We couldnt imagine our lives without him. We feel incredibly blessed to have him in our family and he is such a light in our lives. We also love that his birth family also became a part of our lives and while his birthmom has chosen to not have contact with us at this time we still see some of his extended birth family and we have all been so grateful that Jayden has been able to keep those connections.
Ok, let's rewind a little bit...
About two months after Jayden came to us, Jane's birthmom contacted us. When she emailed us we remember feeling so connected and at ease with her (which was such a huge contrast to how we felt with the first expectant mother we spoke with.) So, when she stopped emailing us we were so confused, but we figured she had chosen to parent and we were ok with that. However, a few weeks later she emailed us again, explaining that she had gotten overwhelmed and wasn't sure if she really wanted to place her baby for adoption and she had also been in the hospital. We ended up meeting her and her parents (on my birthday!) and we later all confirmed that we felt an overwhelming connection and peace with one another. A week later she told us that she had chosen us to be the parents of her baby. About a month and a half later Jane was born and We went from 0 kids to 2 really fast! It was crazy, chaotic, wonderful, and the best thing that has ever happened to us. It is hard to picture a life without Jane and her wonderful and loving birth family. When the four of us left the adoption agency to bring Jane home I remember having this overwhelming feeling of love, wholeness, and more joy than I ever remember feeling in my life. It was so strong that I almost felt as if I could reach outt and touch it. At that moment I knew that there was something special about the four of us being together. I've had similar feeling time and time again when the four of us are together.
After seven years of not being able to get pregnant we became unexpectedly pregnant. We were so elated to be able to bring another person into our family! However, at 10 weeks along, this pregnancy also ended. While grieving the loss of this baby it became very clear to us that, even though we are so humbled and grateful beyond measure for our two sweet children, our family is not yet complete and we would love to be able to add to our family through adoption again.
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